The Teeth-Whitening Alone Is Enough to Kill All Joy in Life!! But the teeth-whitening, PLUS the nose hair-plucking and toe-nail clipping.......
Whiskers! No one ever warned me about them and I don't remember seeing any of my female family members plucking or shaving. I now have tweezers in my car and in my purse. I always see them when I'm in the car on my way somewhere. Now I just sit outside in my car every few days and pluck away and the sun lights them up. My husband knows that if I'm ever in a coma he has to have someone come and pluck my whiskers 2x a week.
OMG! Yes! I got a chipped tooth fixed, ordered new contacts and glasses, getting a legion frozen off my face next week, getting vertigo issue resolved, going through PT for a broken leg and having surgery for breast cancer in October. This maintenance stuff is getting out of hand! Hope yours goes well too! IT IS A LOT! 😂
Omg the bikini waxers...that shit is a hard pass for me. Full bush or don’t bother visiting downstairs. I hate all the depilation. Especially hate leg shaving, as I was hairy all my young life. Ankles to crotch once a week was all I could tolerate. Fortunately menopause made the hair sparser and slower growing but I refuse to shave the pits or the bikini line/leg crease. All you get is a rash. If a man can have hair, so can I. And the facial/eyebrows are handled by a woman who’s from Armenia (famously hirsute people) who whips a thread around like the pro she is. I don’t believe in the “facial routine” crap they’ve fed us all our lives and I have never done it. Read Jessica Defino’s Substack and you’ll see this is all marketing bullshit. Dip out, make your life easier.
The once a decade augering known as a colonoscopy. Which in of itself is not too bad as one is in la-la land, but OMG, the prep is EVIL incarnate.
Frizzy no shine salt & pepper hair✔️
Upper lip hair✔️
Precancerous blobs on my nose burned off✔️
Little red capillaries showing up all over my damn body✔️
Callouses on my feet which need to be electronically buffed down✔️
Teeth cleaning🚫 terrified of DENTISTS SINCE THEY EFFED WITH MY OTHERWISE GOOD TEETH
High Cholesterol✔️ Triglycerides✔️
Cracking neck, creeky left hip✔️
Breast cancer survivor✔️
Just had terrible allergic reaction on eyelids requiring steroid ointment from a supposed all natural line✔️
Toe nails as hard as rocks✔️
Fingernails as soft as Charmin✔️
Other than these I feel great!
All of the above plus-those pesky chin hairs!
I live in Vermont, where many of the women look like Bernie Sanders and are okay with that.
Hate those chin hairs. But am damn glad I still care about maintenance. And friends six feet under no longer have those issues.
Coloring my hair. I'd let it go silver, but it's butt-length, so growing the color out would probably take longer than I have left on this earth, and I don't want to do the big chop, so .... I love all the lotions and creams and plucking and painting and clipping and filing and other stuff, though. Mostly because I work from home and don't have to do any of it if I don't feel like it ....
Strangely enough, I just finished this, about one of my maintenance issues...
...I hasten to add, it's nothing compared to Ms Tamara A below... gosh!
At 92 I have had to make a big chart for the daily routine. I have to be careful to check off exactly when I complete an item or I won't distinguish between today and yesterday. It has freed my mind to remember the name of the book club book and what I just came into my study to ask Alexa.
It’s the painting on of my eyebrows every day. I have no eyebrows, eyelashes or hair on my head for that matter. I have autoimmune alopecia, since I was 6. The eyebrows just vex me. I’ve tried temporary tattoos but I can’t get them on straight and they rub off after a couple of hours. Waterproof, wipes off after a few hours. Bangs on my wig. It drives me to drink! (A nice bottle of Chardonnay sounds good right now) But at least I don’t have to deal with the hair care products--I throw my wig on, pouf it up a little and go! 😜
I waited until I was 73 years old to get veneers - just the tops. What a difference it made in my smile. In addition to not having to painfully whiten my sensitive teeth anymore, which wasn't working anyway, my dentist shaved down my teeth to vampire points and she was able to create new front teeth that were straighter than my old ones. Why didn't I do it sooner? Worth every penny.
Yes, it is exhausting not to mention putting on way too much makeup to look like I don’t have on much makeup. Ready for the desert island with no men. 🤷🏽♀️
I'm 80. Plucking chin hairs when I can't see them!
Hair cutting/ coloring. I've been doing it at home since lockdown, but I'm sick to death of it. But I also have a thing about the mirror at the hairdressers-- specifically, I hate the way I look in it, and if I could persuade them to give me general anesthesia the instant I hit the chair, I'd pay the upcharge for it -- but it's really time I get over myself and call the stylist, already.
(As for the chin whiskers and facial peachfuzz, I've been removing them with Shiseido microblades, which, IMHO, are the answer to a maiden's prayer.)