The Supreme Court Writes to Ask E. Jean

Dear E. Jean:

Hi! We are an energetic, attractive group of go-getters. Just this week, for instance, we took away the rights of half the country and made certain the other half will get killed in a mass shooting.

And yet, people are complaining?!! We know we can’t be stopped, so how do we handle the bitching and moaning? How do we just get on with our job, end gay marriage and stop people from falling in love and using contraception?

Anxiously awaiting your reply,

The United States Supreme Court

Dear US Supreme Court, You Worthless Pieces of Crap:

You know, darlings, I hate to chastise any group of religious maniacs—how you woman-hating dingbats choose to worship your gods is up to you—I’m just writing to let you know that those brain-damaged rulings you issued this week are not gonna stand!

P.S. I do not include the illustrious Justice Sonia Sotomayor, the cogent Justice Elena Kagan, or the delightful Justice Stephen Breyer in my reply.

P.P.S. But I do especially include

Ravishing regards and go jump in the lake!

E. Jean

My Beloved Conflabbians!

Do you have any advice for the US Supreme Court……?

Meanwhile, here’s a very short “To Do” List:

1. Make the mid-terms a one-issue election.

This is what the Suffragettes did, and it worked. They organized! They got arrested! They got thrown in jail! Then they loaded an entire train full of women who’d been imprisoned for agitating for voting rights and raised hell across the country! They won!