Talk Dirty To Me

Dear E. Jean:

My husband is a slob! I've been married for three years and everything was fine until a few months ago. When I met him, he was a clean guy, taking showers every day, pampering himself, smelling good. Now he refuses to shower or brush his teeth, and when he does, it's every two or three weeks! I've tried everything: talking calmly, being humorous about it, attempting to understand why it's happening. I even offered him bubble baths with me, and finally, yesterday, I screamed at him.

Needless to say, the whole situation has become a love killer. Our sex life is practically nonexistent. My husband tells me I have the problem. He says if I'm so unhappy about my life, I should go back to Europe (I am French) where I belong! What do I do? --Something Is Rotten In Denver

Denver, My Musk Melon:

Hate to slap you in the face with a dirty washcloth, my darling; but this is a thing.