I'm Too Sexy For . . . My Tennis Club???

Norway’s Women’s Beach Handball Team Was Fined for Wearing This:

Instead of This:

The European Handball Federation fined the Norwegian women 150 euros each for wearing shorts instead of bikini bottoms in a match. So blistering was the wrath of women ‘round the world that the International Handball Federation changed the rules requiring those skimpy bottoms. This was last summer. Now let’s turn to an Ask E. Jean letter, Sportive Reader, and see what kind of headway American women are making in busting the pants off the panting, priapic patriarchy.

From LM to E. Jean, 1:48 PM, January 2, 2022

Hello, E. Jean:

I’m writing to you about a bizarre situation at my sports club—and the sexist, ignorant bullies running it. This fall I was accused by the tennis manager of "suggestive stretching," wearing “tight clothing,” and of complaining about a man who groped me in the swimming pool. I have a strong background in sports, education and coaching. I have written several letters to get a retraction from the director of the club, who agreed with the tennis manager’s false accusations that “tennis players were avoiding the use of the tennis center because of me.” After three months, he just sent a letter with more false accusations!

I am angry! I feel stuck. There are no other pool/tennis facilities near me. I live in a mountain state, my county has around 100,000 people, the sports club has around 6,000 members, and is owned by a big corporation. It’s a large, modern facility, I know many of the employees, trainers, and teachers; and I am very social. So I was not shy about asking others who were present during the time mentioned if I was “distracting” them with my “inappropriate positions” and “in-your-face stretching.” Nobody agrees with the accusations. Any ideas on what I can do? Because I am not an employee, I don’t think HR will help. Another case of creepy men defending creepy men. —LM

From E. Jean to LM, 2:43 PM, January 2, 2022

OH!

MY!

GAWD!!

Let me ruminate on this outrage. My immediate desire is to introduce myself to the director and “suggestively stretch” his jockstrap four or five times around his neck.

Meanwhile, Ms. LM, can you give me a few more details about the pool incident? And can you describe your work-out wardrobe? I’m intrigued by the words “tight clothing.” I mean! Really! Has this director ever seen a female Olympian? Viz: Anna Chicherova

Or . . . Simone Biles

Or . . . Alica Schmidt

Ravishing regards,

E. Jean

From LM, 5:36 PM, January 2, 2022

E. Jean:

The third picture of the runner made me laugh and cry. I was an All-America college runner in the 1500 meter.

Here are the details you asked for: I’m 5 feet, 4 inches, 110 lbs., and built like a fence post. I wear black tennis shorts and a tank top, with bare arms and legs. The pool situation is kind of fuzzy, but it is on surveillance video and I requested that the man never come close to me again. Bottom line: I should have reported it to the police. But I did not speak up until about 6 months later when I heard the pool guy was harassing other women with gestures, body comments, gawking, phone calls, and stalking. Then I talked to the manager and the director about using the club’s membership policy to suspend him for at least a few weeks. They did nothing.

Now the tennis manager is using that incident against me. The accusations were made this fall, when I was stretching in the tennis center instead of the main gym (because of COVID and the limited designated stretching space next to the weight room). I play tennis three days a week, and two of those days I would stretch when the center was empty. One day a week there were other people there, but I was at the back of an empty court and, as stated above, I was not taking up very much space. Absolutely nobody cared or was watching me except, apparently, the director and the tennis manager. 

Really creepy and one reason it makes me angry is because I have an autoimmune disorder; so I am very careful about COVID. I am religious about stretching and physical therapy, and I LOVE SPORTS! 

I keep thinking of the words “body shaming.” Life is hard enough without sexual crimes and harassment. I haven’t really talked about this but I have a  mastectomy scar and I still get sad when I see it or take a bath. Really pisses me off when men get away with being assholes. Thank you —LM

P.S. Did you hear about how they fined the women’s Norwegian beach volleyball team? RIDICULOUS!!!

LM, My Luv:

I’m in the middle of my reply to you—advising you to ask your attorney to send a letter to the CEO of the Corporation which employs these two cretins and demand that they immediately retract their accusations—and what do you do?