How Did You Learn There Was No Santa Claus?

My Deceived and Disillusioned Darlings!

1. How old were you when it crashed upon you: THERE . . . . IS. . . . NO . . . SANTA?

2. Who told you?

3. Where were you when the bubble burst?

4. How did the revelation make you feel?

5. Did believing in Santa with your whole heart make you more susceptible to the made-up crap laid on you by your parents (teachers, ministers, politicians, etc., etc.)

6. Or . . . when the dog pulled the big white beard off Santa’s face and he turned out to be Mr. Simmons the neighbor down the street—did it leave you more skeptical of what the world tries to tell you ?

7. BUT HOWEVER NEVERTHELESS ON THE OTHER HAND . . . . . . . are you one of those wise Conflabbians who still believes and still loves Santa and his reindeer and his flying sleigh and his magical bag and his presents and his elves and his roof-top landings, and, indeed, his whole Ho Ho Ho?

Me? It was 2nd grade. My little friend came to me distraught. Someone had told her: “There’s no Santa Claus.” I…