Bosom Friends

& The Wicked Woman of the Week

For Wicked Woman of the Week, scroll (if you can) past the busts.

Code of the Bosoms, 2021

Years ago, I received a letter at the Ask E. Jean desk asking: “what are the rules between girlfriends?” I’ve been updating it ever since:

—Never give a friend the side-eye.

—Never stay silent when a friend is falling for an asshole.

—Never leave an inebriated friend alone at a bar.

—Never reveal a friend’s secret.

—Never date a friend’s ex.

—Never let a friend get away with believing that Trump won the election.

—Never invite a friend’s enemy to a party.

—Never allow a friend to fall for a conspiracy.

—Never dine alone with a friend’s husband, unless it’s his last meal and he’s being shot at dawn.

—Never refuse to write a recommendation for your friend’s off-spring (no matter how big a dolt the kid is).

—Never NOT favorite your friend’s tweets.

—Never NOT heart the hell out of your friend’s Instagrams.

—Never NOT subscribe to your friend’s Substack.

—Never NOT go into paroxysms of delight when your friend text…